"There's a Bomb on the Bus....."

I was bored. I looked at the clock - "1 more hour to go!!!" it screamed. I twiddled my thumbs idly, and for some inexplicable reason thought of Keanu Reeves. His immortal line from Speed jumped at me out of the blue and suddenly I had - what my 4-year-old nephew calls - "a great idea!"

I sent a message on the chat to our front desk - "There's a bomb on the bus" - I sat on my hands and waited - 5 minutes passed, nothing happened; 10 minutes, still nothing; 15 ...nada; I crept down the stairs slowly and peeked at the front desk. The receptionist was on the phone. I hid from view and watched. She hung up and turned to her monitor. She frowned, she rubbed her eyes, she looked around, she frowned harder...then, she shrugged and went back to her work.

I charged - "Didn't you get my message!?!?" I asked incredulously.
"Oh...you sent that..?" she asked unruffled.
"Yes!" I almost screamed and waited expectantly...she continued working. "There's a bomb on the bus!!!!" I gesticulated wildly.
"What bus?" she asked looking up and leaning back in her chair.
"How should I know!?!?!?" my eyes were huge and incredulous with disbelief.
She shrugged again and gave me a 'where-did-you-escape-from?' look and went back to work.
"Aren't you going to do something !?!?!" my voice rose to a shrill pitch.
"What do you want me to do?" she asked without looking up.
"Well...how about looking up at me for a start!!!! Aren't you worried? People are going to die!!!"
"People die all the time..." she said. I couldn't dispute THAT.
"Do something!!!" I commanded.
"Well....I can sing pretty well..." she offered sarcastically.
"Send everyone to the lunchroom!!!" I suggested ignoring her last remark.
"Why? Because there's a bomb on a bus somewhere in the city?" she asked
"What bus?!?!?" I yelled.
"How should I know?" she shot back..."You're the one that sent the message."
"Is that what I said!?!? No, no, I meant there's a bomb in this building!!!!" I was hysterical.
"Oh..?" she said.
'Oh' what!?!?! ...evacuate everyone then...send a message and ask everyone to go to the lunchroom. NOW!!!" I barked.
"Go to the lunchroom" she said yawning
"Just me!?! What will I do there all by myself!?!? Tell EVERYONE!!"
"I can assure you no one will want to go to the lunchroom now" she said.
"Tell them what I told you!!" I was talking very loudly.
"That there's a bomb on the bus?" she asked.
"No, no, that there's a bomb in the lunchroom! Then, everybody WILL go!!!" I screamed.
She looked at her watch and got up. "Look, you'll miss your van, and I'll miss mine...why don't you go home and take your tablets and get some sleep?" she was already on her way out.
"Oh...ah...yes, my van..." I mumbled and followed her tamely.
As I passed the security officer's cabin, I saw him glued to the TV. I peered in - Maria Sharapova was on center court in her night clothes under the blazing Aussie sun.
"It's hot there, isn't it!" I remarked.
"You bet" the security officer grinned.
"Psst..." I said, gesturing for him to come closer. He leaned out.
"There's a bomb on center court" I whispered.
"I know" he said....and winked.